Sorry seems to be a useless word...

When I was growing up with two sisters and a brother, we would fight as kids do. Sometimes we would cross the line and have to apologize.
Even as an adult, we can and have crossed relationship boundaries and inflicted harm, but is saying your sorry enough? What is necessary to amend the breach, to get a Mulligan, make up for that party foul?

Many of us have that friend or family member who seems to do a lot of saying they're sorry. After a while, the words don't change a thing, and if you've ever had to be the one saying it repeatedly, it becomes a source of pain, hypocrisy, and shame. Eventually we stop saying it at all, and either push people away, or run away ourselves. My experience with this has led me to see that saying sorry doesn't equal repentance.

The word repentance means to turn away from. So in light of this definition, has sorry got the power to turn us away from the harmful or wrong behaviors in our lives?

I think not. At least not in my experience. So where does that leave us? What is necessary to attain repentance?

Every one of the major world religions have one thing in common - confession.
What is confession? One current and popular understanding of confession is telling another person or a priest what acts you've committed that you believe are wrong or arouse feelings of guilt. But is it enough?  Or is it a half measure? If we are honest with ourselves, we see ourselves confessing the same acts over and over again. And through sheer repetition, grind down Gods feast of grace into just a meal that leaves us hungry.

Through my experience I have come to believe, that knowledge of our wrongs is not as important as the realization of the true nature of them. In other words, we must examine our motives. The what and, more importantly, the why of what we do wrong is what requires confession.

It also requires the viewpoint of another, after all, our own corrupted  view of ourselves and our actions is by its own nature, incapable of being unbiased, or true, if you will.

What we need is a trusted friend, who is willing to listen, be patient, and if they really love us, aren't afraid to tell us the truth about ourselves even if it will hurt or offend us on the way to freeing us from a bondage of our own making.